Buzz, Balls & Hype : THE DOCTOR IS IN

A Formula for Those of Us Who Dislike Formulas*

In my improv class, we are currently studying narrative structure. Last week, our teacher, Rob, handed each of us a piece of paper with the beginning of a sentence written on it. Our task was to go around the circle in order, each of us reading our opening aloud and completing it in a way that moved the story forward. The openings were as follows:

Once upon a time there was a world where...
And every day...
And every day...
Then one day...
And because of that...
And because of THAT
But then...
And because of that...
And so...
And finally...

After a couple of false starts, we managed to create some credible, if abbreviated, stories. It was fun and interesting to participate in the building of these bare-bones narratives. "You'd be surprised," Rob told us, "how many great stories fit into this template."

You bet I’d be surprised, I thought. This formula was useful for creating the simplified story lines needed for improv; but great, original narratives can’t be squeezed into a 10-point outline, right?

For homework that week, we each had to watch a movie and describe it using this template. My assigned movie was “The Shawshank Redemption.” Here’s what I came up with (spoiler alert, obviously):

Once upon a time there was a world where brutality and corruption ruled. And every day, the more powerful brutalized the helpless. And every day, Red tried to get by without hoping for anything better. Then one day, Andy, who was innocent, intelligent, and the vice president of a bank, was incarcerated. And because of that he helped the guards and the warden with their finances, including corrupt schemes. And because of THAT he was able to use his influence to improve life for all of the prisoners, including Red. But then, evidence of Andy’s innocence surfaced. And because of that, the warden, frightened that he would expose the corruption if he was released, turned against him. And so, Andy escaped, used the embezzled money to flee to Mexico, and did expose the corruption, leading Red to realize that hope can be a positive thing. And finally, Red was released and joined him in Mexico.

Okay, but come on, this was a simplified movie version of a Stephen King novel. It couldn’t possibly apply to actual literature.

To prove how impossible it was, I tried it on a few favorites. And look:

Once upon a time there was a world where orphans were considered less than human. And every day, Mrs. Reed spoiled her own children while treating Jane with contempt. And every day, John Reed played horrendous “tricks” on Jane. Then one day, Jane couldn’t take it anymore, and fought back. And because of that, she was sent to Lowood School, which wasn’t much more brutal than the Reeds’ home. And because of THAT she went to work for Edward, who fell in love with her. But then the brother of Edward’s insane wife exposed him as an attempted bigamist. And because of that, Jane ran away and tried to start a new life, but she realized they were destined for each other. And so the first wife perished in a fire she had started herself, freeing Jane and Edward to marry. And finally they had a baby and lived happily ever after.

Or what about this:

Once upon a time there was a world where respectable couples didn’t have sex until they were married, and couldn’t marry without money to live on. And every day, Kate and Merton longed for each other. And every day Kate tried to come up with a scheme that would earn them enough money to marry. Then one day Milly, a rich girl with a serious illness and a crush on Merton, came into their circle. And because of that, Kate figured that Milly was their ticket to marriage. And because of THAT, she convinced Merton to court Milly in the hope that Milly would marry him and then die. But then, Milly found out about the plot and became depressed and died, leaving Merton a lot of money. And because of that, Merton realized that he was in love with Milly after all. And so, overcome with remorse, he refused the bequest and told Kate she could have either him or the money, but not both. And finally they were both miserable and disillusioned.

(Yes, those sentences are kind of run-on, but consider the source.)

It gets more complicated when you bring in secondary protagonists—I tried it with Pride and Prejudice, and had to fork it off into parallel narratives, one for Elizabeth and another for Jane, because even though I think of Elizabeth as the “real” MC, the novel couldn’t work structurally (for me) without the Jane/Bingley subplot. And I don’t even want to start thinking about War and Peace. But, truly, this formula is useful not only in creating stories, but in deciding what I think are the most important plot points in existing ones.

I’ve been running some old stories that don’t work through this Formulator™, and it’s making it easier for me to identify weaknesses: I haven’t made the world of the story clear enough; the “but then” comes too early or too late; the cause and effect sequence is muddled. And I plan to use it to outline new stories, too. Amazing.

*Thanks to Rob Schiffmann at Chicago City Limits for this template, and for being a great teacher generally!

Susan O'Doherty, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist with a New York City-based practice. A fiction writer herself, she specializes in issues affecting writers and other creative artists. She is the author of Getting Unstuck without Coming Unglued: A Woman's Guide to Unblocking Creativity (Seal, 2007). Her Career Coach column appears every Monday on Inside Higher Ed's Mama, Ph.D. blog, and she is a regular guest panelist on Litopia After Dark. She can be reached at Dr.Sue at mindspring dot com.

3 Comments

Sue: You left out the most important mystery in the Shawshank Redemption: Why was Andy's friend called Red? (In the book "Red" was a redheaded Irishman.)

Posted by: Jack O'Doherty | August 12, 2011 at 05:45 PM

Isn't the character's name Ellis Redding?

Thank you Sue, for this really wonderful template, which offers a useful diagnostic tool for revising the plotting and pacing of a novel.

Posted by: Katharine Weber | August 13, 2011 at 08:16 AM