Thursday + Gregory Huffstutter = The Ad Man Answers
Q: What can Robert Downey Jr. teach us about author websites?
A: Don’t disclaim.
In an interview for the movie “Iron Man,” Downey Jr. was asked if he had something to prove to people who didn’t think he could play a superhero. His response:
I thought it was an interesting opportunity to do something that people probably wouldn’t have imagined I could do. But I had to believe in myself. And there’s the lesson, right? If I’m not in my own cheering section, why should anybody else be?... Don’t let on that you’re less sure than they are.
Downey Jr.’s on-screen character, a weapon’s designer named Tony Stark, takes this bravado to the next level:
*They* say that the best weapon is the one you never have to fire. I respectfully disagree. I prefer the weapon you only have to fire once. That's how Dad did it, that's how America does it... and it's worked out pretty well so far.
After a series of columns on author websites (#30 - #33), the Ad Man received several requests to check out newbie author homepages. A common thread between many of these author sites was an underlying lack of confidence.
Conscious or not, these authors were coming across as slightly embarrassed about having their own website – like they were uncomfortable with the attention, or apologetic for not yet having a six-figure advance from HarperCollins.
“Disclaiming” can take the form of:
- Too-long author bio that lists everything you’ve ever written, including your third-grade book report on bullfrogs
- Too-short author bio that skirts the issue of your inexperience by omitting everything but your name and hometown. If you don’t have writing credits, show us that you at least have a personality.
- Pleas for help – financial or otherwise. Allowing Google Ads is another form of begging, since you’re basically saying: “I’m too cheap to pay $10/month for my own web hosting.”
- Rants about the publishing industry. Save your frustrations for your diary or blog.
- Irrelevant information. Writing tips or bonus material for your book is one thing. But does Lee Child have pictures of his kids or childhood pets on his website? You shouldn’t either.
When I mentioned these points to one author, her reply was: “I was trying to compensate for nothing much going on with submission by adding a bunch of other, unrelated content.”
Trying to compensate. That’s a natural reaction, right? It’s why some short people choose to wear lifts, bald guys get fitted for toupees, and Hollywood starlets avoid red carpets without Spanx.
The trick is finding the right balance between quiet confidence and over-the-top cockiness – so you’re not drifting into Tony Stark territory. If you need an example of how confidence is done well – without being egotistical or bratty – you should model your author website after this.
Sure, you say. It’s easy to be confident when you’re getting reviewed by Janet Maslin and jetting off for a nationwide book tour. What to do when you’re struggling to sell your first novel, and have already been rejected by every agent and publisher in the NY Tri-State area?
Make your homepage about you and your work as it exists today. If you don’t have quotes from other people about your writing, solicit them. If you don’t have anybody writing stories about you, interview yourself. Share good news and forward progress, but gloss over the setbacks. Hire a professional photographer and website designer. Focus on putting your best foot forward and eliminate anything that brands you as a hobbyist.
Treat your website like it’s a blind date. And be honest, which guy is more attractive? The one shows up at your doorstep whose first words are: "I don't normally wear Hawaiian shirts, but I'm kind of feeling bloated today, and my good pants are at the dry cleaners, so normally I look much better, really."
Or this one?
"Hi, my name's Ted. Good to meet you."
So be confident. If that doesn’t come naturally, follow the advice of JA Konrath: Fake confidence, and real confidence follows.
And if all else fails, keep repeating the mantra from Robert Downey Jr… Don’t let on that you’re less sure than they are.
Gregory Huffstutter has been punching Ad Agency timecards for the past decade, working on accounts like McDonald's, KIA Motors, and the San Diego Padres. He recently finished his first mystery, KATZ CRADLE and is currently on submission. The first 100 pages of his novel are linked here. For general advertising questions, leave a comment or send e-mail to katz @ gregoryhuffstutter dot com with 'Ask The Ad Man' in the subject line.
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